Happiness is fuzzy and purple...

I made a new friend today... ^o^

Breaking News!

I have paid for my visa! =D YES!! happy, good, amazing news! cause for rejoicing!

now for the bad news... I wasn't supposed to get my medical examination or my x-rays done until AFTER paying -_- There are specific doctors that I have the choice of seeing to get all this done, and two forms that I have to bring with me as well...

So! all that money I borrowed from my uncle (and the tears that followed) just went down the drain... *sigh..* ah well.. **** happens, and life goes on...

I found out which doctors I can go see, looked up their names in my insurance and called both of them, but insurance won't cover either. so phooey! this is all going to be out of my pocket >.<>have money. but that's all the money that I have, and it has to last me until July 15 (four days before I'm supposed to leave). However, if I don't get my visa I won't be going anyway.. so... guess who's going to be broke again?

At one doctor's the cost is $300 for everything (with a very friendly receptionist on the phone too ^^, I liked her). The other doctor is $250, (but not as friendly a receptionist as the first one). I'm going to have to go with the cheaper one though. "Beggars can't be choosers."

I'll let you guys know how things turn out... But as a good friend reminded me this morning.. Well, ok two good friends lol... "I need to CHILL! God will work it all out and everything will be fine. if i end up going or not... and the good thing is that there are advantages to going and to not going..." and from the other friend "This is why I tell you: Don't worry about your life... Look at the birds of the sky: they don't sow or reap or gather into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Aren't you worth more than they? ... Learn how the wildflowers of the field grow: they don't labor or spin thread. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was adorned like one of these! If that's how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and thrown into the furnace tomorrow, won't he do much more for you--you of little faith? So don't worry... For the idolaters eagerly seek all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first the kingdom of god and His righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you. Therefore don't worry about tomorrow, because tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

You know.. I used to HATE that passage growing up.. because it was one of the longest passages I had to memorize for Bible, and it was sooo annoying because it was soo long! I've never forgotten it because I hated it so much actually lol.. but I needed to be reminded of it today. Thanks April! ^_^

more tears and frustration

So... I just posted about all the chores and documents that I needed to do.. And all of that in itself would give ANYONE a headache.. but there's more that lies underneath...

Presently, with all the **** I've been wading through, and the tasks to get completed, and all the struggles and frustrations I'm having... I'm trying to remember why I wanted to go to Australia in the first place. And why in the world am I putting myself through all of this. I'm trying to convince myself that it will all be worth it in the end. i'm trying SO hard.. and i just end up crying. I think i cried myself to sleep last night actually.. I spent the afternoon cleaning the kitchen, and crying, cuz i was so stressed out about everything.

And not only was I stressed, have been stressed, but I've been alone for most of it. My brother started his summer classes on Tuesday. My uncle works all day and comes home in the evenings. we're never sure when he's coming in actually.. And my grandmother's been in the hospital. Steven and I don't know anyone in Arlington. we don't have any close friends here.. and, don't get me wrong, i LOVE my alone-time, but a month of it is just too much.

Now some of you, well probably most of you, knowing my friends, would suggest that I get involved with my church. I've tried that. I've tried to do that EVERY TIME I'M IN THIS COUNTRY. At least I tried until this year. this year was it. I didn't want to bother with it anymore. See... in 8th grade I used to be really involved in my church, especially in the youth. I did everything i possibly could! it was the FIRST time for me to actually feel AT HOME and really WELCOMED in a church. and the first time for me to be in a church youth group actually. I loved it. But I was only there for 6-7 months, and then i went back to the Philippines until my eldest brother got married a year and a half later in 2005. didn't have much time to do anything with the youth, but i went over there.. next time was in 2006. we were here for the ENTIRE SUMMER. and i tried. i tried so hard to get back into the youth group.

but... idk.. it was like they didn't care if i was there or not. it didn't matter that i had been gone, because they couldn't remember that i had been there before. i felt like i didn't exist. and I'd never been to a public school in the states, i don't keep up with popular music :p so i had NO idea what ANY of them were talking about AT ALL. (of course, we must all keep in mind that this summer was just after i was suicidal for about 3-4 months... That's a story for another time, that probably won't be told on here...) I guess after that.. i didn't bother trying anymore.. When i started college, I tried joining the college group. but it was all the same people as before. they didn't care. and they still don't care. they don't meet to study God's word at all. they meet almost purely for social matters. why do they even bother with the pretense of studying? it frustrates me to no end, so I don't go to the college group anymore.

and I guess that whole back story is where my main fear stems from.. I'm terrified that I'll leave for Australia in July, and come back to school in January, or even when I'm back for Thanksgiving, and find that my place among my friends has been taken. that i've been replaced. or that we will all have changed so much that we cannot relate to one another anymore. I'm afraid that i will become a stranger to my friends. I'm already feeling left behind. i couldn't find a job this summer, not that i really tried, since i'm supposed to be leaving in mid-July (if my visa comes through). There wasn't really a point. and most of my friends have jobs this summer, so they're working, while i sit on my bum, staring at my laptop screen cuz i have nothing to do and no friends to hang out with or talk to.i feel useless, lonely, and abandoned. only I'M the one who's not doing anything. I'M the one who's going to another country for 4 months (God willing). so why do I feel like i'm being left behind? it doesn't make sense, even to me. but it's how i feel.

I'm scared. I'm really scared. I'm scared that i can't keep up with the other students in Australia. Art class, photography, choir, tech/stage crew work... stuff i haven't done since high school! and there's no way i'll be able to skype with all my friends or be on facebook all the time. I'm sorry to those of you who command me to skype them and keep up, but the chances of that are EXTREMELY slim. and besides, you all have your own lives to live, right? how are the crazy antics of a friend on the other side of the world going to affect your lives?

Call it my inferiority complex or something.. but i'm EXTREMELY lonely, feeling VERY forgotten, lacking encouragement and self-confidence, and trying to get everything done so i can go to Australia. All the while wondering to myself WHY I'm putting myself through hell to try to get there. and hoping and wishing that it'll all be worth it in the end, and that my friends will still be my friends when i return. No matter how much we've changed.

aaaaand i'm crying again.. i think i'll try going to bed now.. sorry for the two depressing blog posts.. but it's been that kind of... summer..

on a happier note, my brother John gets married next weekend! :D and we're going to South Carolina Jun 9th! :D and i found someone to alter my bridesmaid's top for me! :D yay for little miracles ^_^

tears and frustrations...

I realize I'm overdue for writing something.. and I'm trying to think of something that I can write without making everyone depressed or without crying, again... It's been a very hard 12ish days... Obviously, you should be able to tell from the title T_T

Well, it's June 2nd, or it was an hour or so ago.. and I've got a list of things I'm supposed to have filled out and sent in to the ASC office in Washington DC. There's my Medical/Emergency Form, my ISIC and the money for that, register for classes, my Domestic Travel Form, and last, but not least, my State Department Registration. aka: MY VISA. the source of all my tears that I've shed in the past 4 days. the worry that has kept me awake for many nights, reading manga to block out the world, and staying up until much later than I needed. the diabolical, nagging, and yet oh so vitally important task that I MUST have as soon as humanly possible... more on that later

Starting from the top, I have th Med/Em form filled out, faxed AND mailed in to Washington, with copies of my insurance card. The most annoying part? MY GRANDMOTHER'S COMPUTER DOES NOT HAVE MICROSOFT WORD INSTALLED. and I couldn't find the box with the product key >.<>

Next on the list was my International Student Identity Card (ISIC) and the money for that. I actually took care of that AGES ago, with the help of Andrew Stewart :p he took pictures of me in a tree, and I sent one of those in with money to buy the stupid card. So guess who gets to have an ID picture of herself in a tree! -.^ (I completely tore my arm apart climbing that tree too >.<>

Registration opened up the week after graduation while I was still on campus, so THAT was fun to figure out which classes I was taking and WHEN I would take them.. I'm still REALLY confused how that's all going to work out.. I don't think I'm getting any breaks... oh... -_- and I made a teensy-weensy mistake when I was talking with Letu staff and getting "registered" for classes here.. I had originally gotten permission to take TWENTY hours.. (some of you may remember me talking about that). ASC contacted us and said they didn't allow their *regular* students to take more than 18, and most struggled with 17... So.. with 16 being my minimum, and 17 as the max, I signed up for 17 credit hours... I thought..

WHOOPS!

Turns out one of my classes was worth FOUR credit hours.. not three.. so I'll be taking 18 credit hours.. and it's going to feel like at least 22 hours at Letu.. and ALL of it Fine Arts oriented.. well.. except for two classes.. 1/3 of the 18 credit hours are counting towards my degree audit.. the only classes that aren't Fine Arts oriented... Intro to Poly Sci and Cultural Anthropology. They actually have different names at ASC, but that's what they're counting them for at Letu. and besides, I can't remember the real class names -_- (when I get my official schedule, I'll be sure to post it on here so you guys can see what kind of hell I'll be going through)

Next was my TRAVEL FORM... Basically, they needed to know how I'll be getting to LAX where I'll be meeting the group going to Australia, and how I'll be getting back home from LAX. We bought those tickets on Monday or Tuesday I believe.. talk about cutting it close! I didn't have the money for those tickets.. we ended up using all but 3,000 of my SkyMiles, and we had to buy more miles as well... I think I owe my parents around $2-300 for that.. (in case you didn't know, money is going to crop up again and again in this blog, because it has ALSO been a source of many shed tears and sleepless nights and much frustration). But I have my tickets! On July 19, I fly out of DFW around 9:30am, fly to ATLANTA, arrive there around 12:44pm, THEN fly to LAX at 2ish, arriving around 3:30. the group doesn't leave for Australia until 11:55pm... I'm going to have SO much fun sitting in an airport for 8-9 hours doing NOTHING. >.<>

Lastly, we come to the bane of.. my efforts to go to Australia..

Before I complain anymore about how frustrating it's been, I have to admit my own faults here.. I received my EcoE (Electronic confirmation of Enrollment) code on May 19th I believe.. and i SHOULD have started applying for my visa then, but I didn't. I didn't get to work on ANY of the stuff due for June 2nd until Friday afternoon. See, there's this little matter of money that's needed to pay for a plane ticket and a visa... I already told you about the plane ticket. A student visa to Australia costs $540.. I JUST NOW got that money today, (June 2nd) but via check deposit, so I can't touch it until tomorrow afternoon!

but I'm getting ahead of myself...

I started applying for my visa, and all of a sudden two messages in bright blue appear at the top of my screen, saying "Melody Miller needs to undergo a medical examination," and "Melody Miller needs to undergo a chest x-ray." .... then I got to the page where I was supposed to pay, and I didn't have the money :p then I spent about an hour or two trying to figure out where I'm supposed to send in the results of the physical and the xray.. couldn't find anything. so I email the ASC people and ask them if they have any idea where I'm supposed to send the results. They of course get all anxious and concerned about the fact that I don't have my visa yet. I KNOW that it's very important to have my visa in time. I grew up on the mission field, traveling between countries. and if they had read my application (which I'm pretty sure they were supposed to, they would have known that I'm an MK and am use to international travel.. huh.. go figure) so... needless to say, I was very angry at them for practically insulting me >.<>

@%$*#%@*$%@#$%@!!!!!!!

*sigh...* i'm fine...

so... I got my physical done on Sunday actually, because they were open until 5. that pretty much wiped out my bank account.. mostly. I asked them how much an x-ray would cost. $110. ok.. uhm.. hey Grandma? lol.. actually, my Uncle loaned me money for that, since my grandmother has been in the hospital recovering from knee replacement surgery that she had on May 20th (i think...). So I went back to CareNow for the x-ray.. and had to explain about five times WHY i was getting an xray, to four people... finally got the x-ray done, saw the doctor afterwards, i'm fine, i'm healthy, nothing is broken, and i don't have TB :p (i already knew that though) so i go to pay and check out. =) seeing the doctor cost an extra $98... i only had the $110 with me (that's actually ALL i had), and my brother was close to broke as well.. So we called my Uncle Randy, and begged him for more money. -_- So we drive back home, get another $100 from my uncle, then go back to the clinic and finish paying.

Oh, and I'm basically in tears during this whole not-having-money-going-home-borrowing-from-uncle-again deal... i HATE borrowing money. absolutely hate being in debt to someone. and yet, i frequently find myself doing just that. That wasn't what made me cry though. what made me cry was the fact that my uncle is SO much like my dad sometimes, except he's a bachelor. my uncle's never had any kids, so he doesn't have that tender streak like my dad does. Now, my dad can be VERY tender and gentle. My dad is the one i got all of my touchy-feely stuff from, not my mom. And when i upset my dad, yes, he gets angry at me, and gets on to me. But then, and i LOVE my dad for this, he ALWAYS makes sure to come back immediately and lets me know that he still loves me and that he forgives me and that everything is all right. Now.. i KNOW that I upset my uncle.. and i know he forgives me, (at least i hope so...) but it's really hard to have to face someone who is SO much like my dad, and NOT receive that gentle love that i'm so used to receiving from my dad..

I think I stayed in my room and cried most of the rest of that day.. or turned my brain off and read shoujo manga..

Anyways.. the xray results should be in tomorrow. My brother is going to pick those up tomorrow morning before he goes to classes at 1. And then by 3 or 4 i think I'll be able to pay for my visa, and I'll figure out where I'm supposed to send in the results for my physical and my xray... and pray that everything goes smoothly and i get my visa.

an over-due update on my life :p

So... ya.. it's been over a month since I last posted anything. Sorry about that :p so going from where I last left off...

turns out I got the email after chapel. They accepted my application, but I'd been wait-listed... I was very confused. No one had mentioned anything about being put on a waiting list! EVER! not once! I was expecting a pass or fail answer, and instead I received a maybe :p my waiting was not over. Needless to say, I had a meltdown. :p and I STILL had two papers to write by Thursday.

somehow, by the grace of God, I got it all done. Just barely lol... the first paper was for my Principles of Management class, which explained "My Philosophy of Management..." I made up a new one teehee.. ^_^ "demolegranny," a combination of democracy, delegation, and tyranny. my Prof LOVED lol... he said it was "the most well synthesized paper" he had received so far, and i turned it in 15 mins before class! it was the most annoying, most sarcastic paper I have EVER written.

it also marked the FIRST time in my life that a PAPER made me miss math classes...

the second was my... gosh darn it I can't remember which paper it was... *checks her papers from April 22nd...*

aHA! it was my Fine Arts paper lol.. the huge monstrosity that I stayed up ALL NIGHT in MSC1 on Wednesday writing :p that was NOT a fun night. I did manage to get about 45 mins of sleep on one of those couches tho...

ANYWAYS, moving on...

I finished the paper, went back to my dorm and showered and got ready for the day because Jimmy and I were going to Kilgore for him to get his flight physical and I needed to register for the dreaded Spanish CLEP test, (which I finally DID manage to take (again, on VERY little sleep), and managed to pass the first two semesters that I needed credit for. I was actually only EIGHT points away from passing all four semester >.<). So before running to print off my paper and turn it in to my professor, I needed to EMAIL my professors and tell them I wouldn't be in class :p I was also talking with my mom on Skype at the time, and trying to get as much done as humanly possible in the short amount of time that I had, and...

lo and behold! I had another email from ASC...

"Congratulations! I am pleased to inform you that you have been accepted as a student in the Council for Christian Colleges & Universities' Australia Studies Centre (ASC) at for Fall 2010..."

I read it and moved on to the next email. Then froze... read it again, and SCREAMED!!!! talked with my mom a bit more, read the list of stuff I had to do, then ran to print my paper, turn it in, and talked with my profs really quick before grabbing coffee and running to meet Jimmy for our adventure in Kilgore! (i took a nap while he drove, got lost twice, and had his physical).

so... YES! I am now OFFICIALLY going to Australia! I had a few more forms to fill out by May 3rd to confirm my participation, (including money!), which I was able to have filled out and mailed and all that fun, annoying stuff. and again, just in the nic of time!

Then school ended...

and Penn2 guys threw a surprise going-away party for me! complete with ice cream, FLOWERS and a phonebook (in prime condition, I might add!) signed by all of them. :) they. are. AMAZING. lol.. i love those guys ^_^

I attended Brian and April's wedding on Sunday morning, May 9th, after staying up most of the night packing my clothes for moving the next day between weddings :p Crazily packed the rest of my stuff and cleared the room of my stuff, Summer and I rearranged the furniture and cleaned. Then I got checked into my new room in Davis, and began moving stuff over, with the help of multiple random friends (Josh, Jimmy, Rusty, Amber, and Kristy). All the moving was done by 6:05, and I got ready in 20 minutes for Tim and Kristy's wedding. It was beautiful ^_^ Got back to campus, (skillfully missing the bouquet toss ;) yes!) and finished cleaning and moving some last minute things. Summer and I both checked out of our room together at 9:15ish. (someone else was late, not us! :p)

the next week was one of utter boredom, very little cash, many late night movies, two theater movies, a Taco Bell run, and many motorcycle rides...

On Saturday the 15th, I saw two more of my very dear friends, Matt and Tiana, tie the knot at their wedding :) it was lovely :) i sat with the Penn1 Pirates, and failed to skip the bouquet toss this time, since my sister-in-law Rebekah caught me and made to join in!

No, I did not catch the bouquet. Yes, I did try. a little.. not really... Matt's sister Michelle caught the bouquet. :) I thought it was very appropriate, seeing as how I caught the bouquet when I was 15 at my eldest brother's wedding.

After the wedding, I had grilled hamburgers with Basil and Evan, (they cooked, AND cleaned. i just sat there, looked pretty, and ate lol..) then we went to watch the cartoon Robin Hood! and Evan showed up with a BIRTHDAY cake for me! SEVEN WEEKS EARLY! i was shocked :) and very happy ^_^

the next day, was packing, cleaning, and moving day, YET AGAIN! and again I stayed up late reading a book till 4 :p (so sue me! I like to read T_T) Sarah and I managed to get everything out of the room AND the hallway and have the room cleaned, with un-lofted beds, and everything spic-and-span, just they way we found it. Unfortunately.. not all of my stuff fit into my uncle's truck :( so we stowed it away at my brother Sam's house.

Now I have been "home" at my grandma's for a week... Jobless, bored out of my mine, and with no friends. My companions and solace have been found in netflix, my brother Steven, my cellphone, and Facebook (to a small extent). My grandma went in for surgery on Thursday to have her knee replaced, so it has mostly been just me and Steven at the house until Uncle Randy gets off work in the evenings. We haven't burnt the place down either! We visited Grandma yesterday, and she's doing fine, but has little or no appetite, and had low blood pressure and a low blood count. So they have her on a blood transfusion and they haven't gotten her up and walking yet. :( so other than those things! she's fine. we're going to see her again tomorrow, and probably bring flowers or a card this time. We would have gone today, except...

Steven and I were supposed to go back to Longview today to get the rest of my stuff (he bought a truck on Monday! :D), but translation was lost somewhere, and Sam and Bekah didn't know we were coming back this weekend, and so they were at a wedding in Waco and didn't tell us :p SO!! tomorrow is Sunday, and all of my make-up is still in Longview.. needless to say, I will not be attending Sunday school :p

Are you still there? Really? good for you! sorry I didn't warn you how long this would be this time around... I'll have more to say about Australia tomorrow. Thanks for reading guys :)

today is the day!

Good morning everyone! I’m writing this in like the 15 mins I have before class starts :p so this may be very short haha…
So… today is the day I’m supposed to get the email from ASC… I’m so nervous about it that I literally have stress knots in my back! It’s NOT fun. But having blueberry coffeecake from a couple guys on penn2 sure does make waking up easier lol.. sleep didn’t really happen last night. It was more like night terrors of waiting ALL DAY for the email to come in. and then when it finally did, no one was happy for me. it was more like people were angry and resentful :( so ya.. I’m very anxious and nervous today.
But… it’s not so much worrying about the outcome as it is WAITING for the outcome.. I’ve got everything on the line for this.. and I’m trusting that no matter what happens today, it will be in God’s plan. And I trust my Daddy. So today is a sort of milestone for me. My life can go in so many different directions after today. And I’m excited and anxious to see where God takes me!
God is God no matter what the outcome of today is. Whether it ends in loud wailing, or hysterical laughing and squealing, God is STILL God. He is God over my hopes and dreams, in my darkest hours, and in my brightest moments. God is God, and He is in control of my life.

Australia Studies Centre

For you newcomers: Hi. Welcome to my blog. This blog has undergone a few changes over the past two years that I’ve had it. :p But I’m liking my new layout and look, so I think I’ll keep it this way for a while. I used to just write my stories on this site, but now I’ll be adding a lot more than just that… since I’m trying to go to Australia and study abroad next semester, this is my way of letting people know what I’m up to. :p

For you oldtimers: Welcome back! Long time no see…? Or something like that… Basically, ya. I never had much use for this blog, but seeing as how I’m trying to go to study abroad in Australia next semester, and how I usually forget about keeping up with people once I leave them, this is how I’m (hopefully) going to let everyone know how I’m doing.

For those of you who are just now finding out that I’m trying to get out of LeTourneau, yes. I’m trying to study abroad (through Best Semester) in Sydney, Australia. I’d be attending the Studies Centre there, (NOT the state school (AUS)), and the fall semester is July 21-November 20.

I guess maybe I should back up and explain a few things as well… Like why Australia and not Han Dong where most of Letu students go…

So… I really like art. Like, a LOT. My senior year of high school consisted of the required two semesters of English and Bible… everything else I had was a Fine Art of some kind (or a study hall or practical art: sewing (don’t you DARE laugh! It’s not as easy as you’d think!)). The Fine Arts classes were Choir, three art classes (Drawing, Ink/Paint, and Clay), and photography. Now I am at LeTourneau University, which is primarily an engineering and aviation college… Devoid of almost all fine arts… Yes, there is a Jazz Band, and yes, there is a LeTourneau choir… and also the clubs like the LeTourneau University A cappella Singers. But I don’t play any instruments. And the LeTu choir and A Cappella singers… well... Let’s just say they’re not up to par with what I had in high school. :p There are zero art classes as well. I have been starved of art for the past TWO years!

Han Dong did not have any fine art classes that I could see or was interested in. However Australia did. :) which is why I picked ASC. Now, I could have just taken some art classes at like Kilgore or Tyler or even over the summer from UTA or TCC in Arlington. But I didn’t want to. TCC is a community college, and neither Kilgore nor Tyler are liberal arts colleges, (although they do have fine arts programs…) My main reason for going abroad to ASC is to be in an environment where I can basically immerse myself in the art-world. At ASC, I will be taking classes where I will be surrounded by other students who are striving to better themselves in their fine arts. We will be able to share in our struggles and strengths and to encourage and help each other. That kind of community does not exist at Letu. If it does, (and you are a part of it) then I have missed it completely and I apologize to those whom I may have offended or overlooked.

So… when I first talked to Marta about studying abroad, we got a little confused. She thought I wanted to go to the Australia state school, (AUS), which is part of the exchange student program. There weren’t any students from AUS that wanted to come here, so I thought about giving up on the whole idea. Then a couple of weeks later I decide to ask Marta again if there’s any news about the program. Still no one. :p so I give up again. THEN, for some strange reason, I double check with Marta about what the heck she’s talking about when she says AUS… Cuz I had talked with another student on my floor about going to Australia, and she said that she had the same problem with the lack of exchange student to take her place. … that is, until they got the colleges straightened out. That’s when I found out that there were two colleges in Australia that Letu students could go to. So after sending Marta an email asking which school we’re talking about, we figure out that the school I want to go to is ASC, in Sydney, which is an art school, and through Best Semester, which does NOT require a student to come to LeTourneau to take my place. SO! I ran to Marta’s office and got the paperwork that I needed to start the application process. :)
That was about a month before spring break. The week I got the paperwork I was busy with… I can’t remember what actually haha.. (my life has been so hectic!) I think that was the week that I talked with my advisor’s about what classes I can take in Australia that will transfer to my degree audit. The week after that I started running around campus finding all the teachers and faculty that I needed to sign the Approval for Study Abroad form. That took about two weeks, cuz I had to wait for someone to get back from a retreat that they were on over the weekend…

There were about 20 different signatures that I needed to get. In different buildings… and they weren’t in order either… and the faculty weren’t always there when they SAID they would be there… I also had to register for classes here and get all of my holds cleared before I could get a couple signatures. Also, my advisor and I had decided that I would take about 20 hours… 11 of which would count towards my degree audit. I had to fill out SO many forms to get that done the week before. AND talk to four or five different teachers to get their approval and signatures for those credit hours I would take in Australia. I even had to get a signature to take 20 hours (cuz 19 was the Letu limit for study abroad programs) Turns out… ASC only allows their students to take 17 hours max… they recommend 16-17 for exchange students, and I’m not really sure what the minimum is for their regular students… but even 16 hours is a challenge for them… (YIKES!) Soooo… I changed my schedule around to 17 hours, only 6 of which would I get transferred to my degree audit, and got that approved by Marta and by my advisor and the financial aid. So after getting that headache finished, I got ALL the signatures that I needed the DAY before Spring Break. :D

I got home the next day, and immediately started the online application to ASC. Got halfway through, and had to do laundry for traveling to SC.

That’s a whole other story to tell at another time! Ask me about my hitch-hiking adventure sometime ;) it’s great. Or ask JimmyFreakinStewart, Josh Heidorn, or Ian Sipley. They can tell you ALL about it. :p

So I get back to school… and I had 11 days to finish my application (due date was April 1st). Well… the week I got back I had a book to read and a paper (or three) to write by Tuesday night. On top of finishing the application. I was so nervous about everything that I was literally having nightmares and night terrors about not finishing the application, not getting in, not finishing my book and then the paper. It was terrible. I don’t ever remember actually sleeping those first three nights back (Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday night). And that weekend I was also planning on painting the mural for Penn2. Apparently, some people on the floor didn’t know about that. So there was a little argument/fight/quarrel at Saga during lunch on Wednesday. (or was it dinner?) but basically, I ended up having to leave for a few minutes to cool down before I said something I would regret later on. Things eventually got straightened out later, and Penn2 came up with a design that I agreed to paint. So I sketched the design on Friday from about 3-5, break for dinner from 5-6:30ish I think, then back to sketching till around 8. During the break I also played Frisbee, then went and played MORE Frisbee after finishing the sketch. Then a bunch of us went and played sand volleyball. This was when I screwed up my foot somehow… After Volleyball, we went to wal-mart to buy the paint. That was fun too at like midnight :p we were all SO tired, and my foot was hurting SO bad.

That’s an entire OTHER story as well. Come and ask me about it sometime ;) it’s actually pretty funny :)

Saturday, I was up on Penn2 from 10am to 11:45ish, had lunch, then got back to painting from about 12:30pm till 9, working non-stop. FINALLY finished the mural, and we watched a movie, then I went and showered, then went to Sonic with Gary and Korey cuz I completely skipped dinner to finish the mural.

Check out the pics on Facebook! http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=209877&id=563845780

All of that with a hurt foot :p guess what I spent most of the next Monday worrying over? Lol..
By this time, I had two days (ish) to finish my application. While at the same time trying to figure out if my brother can visit me for the MuKappa Goat Roast (Easter weekend at Lake o’ the Pines), and organize a way to pick up my friend Jennifer from the airport on Friday before going to the Lake, and this and that and everything in between. I only had the essay questions left to work on, but they were getting VERY annoying to finish!

BUT! I was successful! I completed the entire online application on Thursday, April 1st. Including getting copies of my passport, transcripts, and certification form (with yet MORE signatures and even a SEAL this time too!) faxed to Australia. In fact, by 1pm that day I received an email from ASC saying that they had received EVERYTHING for my application and that they would notify my on the 19th…

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So… It’s Sunday that I’m posting this… (even though I think I started it on Friday.. :p) about a day until I receive the acceptance/rejection letter. I’m so fricking nervous I don’t think I’ll be able to check my email at all on Monday! I literally have EVERYTHING riding on getting accepted to ASC. I haven’t even looked or thought about what classes I would take at Letu if I’m not accepted. I actually don’t think I will come back next semester. I’m thinking that I will stay with my grandma for a semester in Arlington and work on making a “home” there to actually go home to over the breaks. (See blog entry “Home… or lack thereof” (http://pyxieprincess.blogspot.com/2009/03/home-or-lack-thereof.html) it explains everything about home…) I’ll probably take art classes at the University of Texas in Arlington. My grandma or uncle can drive me there, so I’ll commute instead of live in yet another dorm. And I won’t be full-time, so I can get a job as well. (Hopefully :p possibly at the Container Store… they already have my job application actually… the only reason I didn’t go to the job interview is because I was having my wisdom teeth removed that same day :p gotta love scheduling, eh? [don’t you DARE call me a Canadian for saying that. I say it ALL the time, and I picked it up from my AUSTRALIAN friends, NOT my Canadian ones :P]).

So that’s my plan if ASC doesn’t happen. But OH MY GOSH… I’m literally putting everything on the line for this… I could just up and transfer to another school… At Liberty I’d get a free ride. Ouachita Baptist, where my brother Steven is, is cheaper and I got the same financial aid as I got from Letu. I could also go to JBU, where I’d get a lot more financial aid, or I can go to UTA. *shrugs* however, I’d probably change my major to something along the lines of graphic design or something more artistic than my English major (Digital Writing, which is not really developed AT ALL! I’m still trying to figure out why I’m sticking with a major of gen ed classes…). However, with a change of major and transfer, I’d have to repeat at least one year. IF I’m lucky…

So ya.. that’s the whole thought process behind going to Australia next semester.. well, most of it.. there are some parts of it that are NOT going online, because they are personal matters/issues, and there are others involved who, I’m sure, would rather remain nameless, at least, or even better not even part of it. *shrugs* that’s life. Whayagondoboutit? (Translation: what are you going to do about it). But that is most of it. Now I just have to patiently wait until Monday… and check my email many, many, many times that day.. or don’t check it at all until night time… but that would probably drive me crazy. I think what I’ll do is check my email, and when one comes in from ASC, I’ll have my roommate Summer Brown or someone close to me read it and tell me what it says…

For those of you who actually read this entire blog entry, KUDOS!!! And THANK YOU very much for dealing with my ramblings :p yes, I get very long-winded sometimes. And honestly this is the first time that I’ve ever put any of this down to words… so it’s been a challenge for me to write it all as well. (well, technically I TYPED it up.. and I type much faster than I write.. so perhaps not quite as long as I could have taken…) But ya! Please pray for me today and tomorrow as I wait expectantly for the email and act paranoid about being accepted or not. Also, PLEASE keep checking in on me on this blog. Whether I go to ASC or not, I plan to be updating this blog to let people know what’s going on. (I have the tendency when leaving a place to “shake the dust off my feet and wash my hands of people, looking on to the next/new horizon.” I don’t want to abandon my friends at Letu (and others around the world who may also be reading this!) so this is part of my way to keep up with you guys. The link to this blog is on my Facebook profile, so click on it and stuff… if I haven’t updated this in a week, then PLEASE bug me on facebook and tell me to get my rear in gear and update this! I really want to keep up with my blog this time, so please help me by badgering me ^_^

I think that’s all I have to say for now… it is now 2:22am on Sunday morning… (and I’m pretty sure I started writing this Friday afternoon) Josh Groban is playing on my iTunes, and it’s putting me to sleep.. so I think I shall leave it at that.. or, as my good friend Nicole Amper used to say… “Sleep calls my name in the distance, beckoning me to join it in its adventures in la-la land… I must join it… Goodnight.”